Your Source for Bad Poetry

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Just in case anyone was wondering, I used to write a lot of poetry, self-published, in the fifth grade. There's a lot of unresolved creativity running around out there, I think, and after visiting this page, I'm sure that you'll say it would be better to leave it be. At the very least, you can make comments, and if you'd like to leave poems of your own, please feel free to do so on the comment server. After all, it's not fun without interaction, now, is it?

These poems in particular are written in the 5-7-5 syllable of haiku, but I'll take any kind of submission you'd like, including ballads, epics, songs, e.e. cummings-like unstructure, etc. And yes, any humour you derive/perceive is strictly in your own eyes, although it is my aim to amuse.

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1. 
   what does Nikon have
   that makes us fork over bucks
   ED glass, too cool

2. 
   large block of metal
   weight is so good for the soul
   heavy useful F

3. 
   mysterious gears
   ugly whirring snapping noise
   ah, F doesn't work

4. 
   creases on body
   clean F lines are too hard, sharp
   softer on F2

5. 
   jumpy FTn
   why do you jerk, aperture
   evil ring scratching

6. 
   finger on shutter
   feel titanium dimples
   now the light leaks in

7. 
   walk with the F2
   make loud snapping noise and shoot
   watch the subject flee

8. 
   horizontal move
   flash sync is slow as a slug
   no fill flash for F

9. 
   slip off the back now
   lovely handy pocket, here
   fumble more film in

10. 
    waste a frame again
    a clumsy mirror lock-up
    sensitive trigger

11. 
    sleeker creases now
    molten contours, all-auto
    don't tempt me from F

12. 
    silicon blue cells
    rugged, reliable ones
    cost the bigger cash

13. 
    glory days are gone
    once used for all the press shots
    now dusty, sadly

14. 
    miniature controls
    break your nail knobs and levers
    now have steel fingers

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Please supplement my banal poetry with poetry/comments of your own.

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Please note that you can make your haiku look nice by wrapping the text in the center tag:

 
 <center> xxxx </center> 

(which would put the word "xxxx" in the center of the line) or by wrapping it in the paragraph alignment tag:

 <p align = center> xxxx </p> 

(which does the same thing, but you can choose to align left or right by substituting the appropriate word for center as you see fit). To make each line appear on a different line, use the linebreak tag:

 xxxx <br> 

after each distinct line. Or you could just use plain text format with the plain text tag:

 <pre> xxxx </pre> 

if you wish. In each case, insert your text where you see the word "xxxx" in plain text format (usually defaults to Courier for most browsers). For example, the first boring haiku up above is HTML-encoded as:

 <p align = center>
  what does Nikon have <br>
  that makes us fork over bucks <br>
  ED glass, too cool <br>
 </p>

And you thought that HTML was difficult ...

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Take me back to Mike's home page